


Why Me?

by NoelleWynters



Category: Once Upon a Time in Wonderland (TV)
Genre: F/M, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-11-28
Updated: 2013-11-28
Packaged: 2018-01-02 21:31:58
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,475
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1061884
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NoelleWynters/pseuds/NoelleWynters
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>One night during their travels through Wonderland Alice ponders why exactly anyone would fall in love with her, which ends with a bit of a heated conversation with Will.  </p><p>Elsewhere, Cyrus remembers the past.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Why Me?

**Author's Note:**

> Standard disclaimer applies: I own nothing, this is all for fun.

Night had fallen on Wonderland once more, forcing Alice and Will to stop their relentless journey and take a rest. It was too dangerous at night to continue on, there were enough dangers in daylight but at night they increased tenfold. It was always safer, and smarter, to take shelter and wait out the darkness.

Alice sat quietly by the small fire they had built for warmth, they normally would find somewhere to actually stay inside of but this time there were no small caves or even abandoned homes in the general vicinity. So they’d chosen to stay under a rather large tree with far reaching branches in full foliage. It was as good a shelter as any.

She was fairly certain Will was asleep, giving her time to think. It wasn’t always the greatest of pastimes when alone, but she had precious little to do. She looked down and held the pendent that was hanging around her neck in her long fingers, stroking it sadly. Anytime she caught a glimpse of the red glow emanating from it she felt hope wash over her that Cyrus was still alive, although his note had more than confirmed that, but there was a tinge of sadness as she remembered watching him fall and the last thing to fade from sight was the glow of his pendent.

The glowing pendent was a constant reminder of their love, how their hearts were entwined. And it was in sleepless moments like this on their journey to once more find the other half of her heart that she wondered why he’d fallen for her. Of all the girls he’d met, what was it about her that made him love her? Surely in his many, many years he’d met girls prettier and smarter than her. What made her so special that he’d seemingly been smitten the second he’d met her, well, after she stopped threatening to destroy his home that is.

“You really need to stop thinking so loudly,” Will plaintively mumbled from his place on the grassy ground. “Bad enough you’ve got a bloody night light hanging around your neck, you couldn’t just tone the thinking down a bit?”

Alice jumped slightly at the sound of his voice, she’d been certain he was asleep. She turned to look at him, he was glaring at her slightly annoyed but with some concern in his eyes. “Rubbing that bloody thing isn’t going to make him or his bottle appear,” he quipped.

She let go of the pendent and sighed. “I’m well aware of that, thank you,” she retorted, not overly impressed with his strange need to make a slight joke out of things. She understood this wasn’t exactly the easiest situation they were in, but he could try to take it seriously once in awhile. Then again, she mused, she was stressed and was likely taking things a little too personal.

Will sat up, noting that he’d upset her more than she already was, and that had not been his intentions. He just wanted to lighten the mood a bit, this journey was taking a toll on them both. He for one did not want to be in Wonderland, not only because everyone wanted his head served up on a silver platter, but just about everything reminded him of Anastasia. That was something he had no desire to be reminded of, ever again. It was bad enough she’d turned on him, and he had learned to be at peace with the fact she wasn’t the wide eyed girl he’d fallen in love with in the Enchanted Forest, but he sure didn’t need to be reminded of it every waking moment.

Quite frankly he had longed numerous times to just slip away when Alice was asleep, return to Storybrooke one way or another, and put this all behind him. What did it really matter to him if they ever found Cyrus? Alice was a pretty girl, she certainly could have her pick of men anywhere she went, why was she so set on finding this bloody genie? It was possible he was just being a cynic and had become one after all that had happened to him, but it seemed ridiculous they were risking life and limb to find some magical entity that in all truth was going to outlive her, and that really made the relationship sound all the more screwed up to Will.

Cyrus had to know Alice would eventually die, so why would he even want to have a relationship with any mortal? Will just could not wrap his mind around any of it, all of it seemed completely pointless. It made him wonder if it was at all possible the genie was simply trying to gain freedom in more ways than one. He must understand human nature better than any one of them, he would know how to play Alice to have her wish for his freedom from his bottle.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to sound flippant. This whole situation is just a mess is all,” he apologized, smiling.

Alice nodded slightly, a sad sigh escaping her lips. “I know, I hope we can find him soon, before anything worse befalls any of us.”

“Look Alice, I’m not trying to be rude here or anything, but I just have to know. We’ve never really talked about Cyrus, other than you going on about your memories of him which are fine and dandy, don’t get me wrong. You two don’t give me cavities like a certain pair back in Storybrooke, but I don’t understand any of this. He’s a genie for crying out loud! He isn’t a normal bloke, you won’t have a normal life with him. If you want kids, I’m fairly certain you won’t be having that unless you wish him out of that bottle permanently and make him as mortal as you are,” he stated, slight agitation coming through in his voice. He’d tried to hold it in but in his sleep deprived state he’d failed miserably.

Alice glared at him with anger flashing in her eyes. “I don’t care about children, I don’t want them. I want Cyrus and whatever time fate grants us. Why would I want children, I’ve seen how poorly that works out.”

Will flinched; there was one sore spot he hadn’t meant to hit. At least not intentionally, he kind of figured it would come out at some point though. “Fine, you don’t want kids and I would guess he couldn’t care less on that either, all things considered. But you’re going to grow old and die, and you’re going to have to use those wishes eventually to send him back into his bottle, before that day comes. You’ll age Alice, and he won’t. And furthermore, don’t you get a feeling he’s just playing you to gain permanent freedom? The guy has been around for hundreds of years, I imagine he knows how to play with human emotions quite well.”

“You weren’t there, Knave,” she spat out, drawing out his title a little too long as if to make an insult out of it. “I asked about wishing him free and he told me it can’t be done, there was no hint of deception in his voice. Maybe I’m the one being selfish in all this, not him. All I’ve ever wanted was for someone to love me, someone to see me as a person and not a burden or a constant reminder of something that once was. My father never looks at me, he looks through me. If he does see me for even a passing moment I know all he is seeing is the reason the love of his life is no longer with him! Cyrus sees me, he doesn’t see some insane little girl, or a reminder of things that once were, he sees me. He knows all my flaws and yet he still loves me, and believe me, he denied those feelings for a long time, I think even after I assured him I’d never move on he still had doubts but kept them silent. I could see it in moments he thought I wasn’t looking. The fact he actually puts up with me is enough to make me love him, I want him to be happy, even if it will be short lived. And it is possible I’m just being selfish, I want to be loved so badly and be seen as my own person, and not a shadow of my mother, I’m clinging to the first person, human or otherwise, that actually looked at me and saw who I am, not a reminder of painful memories or a burden to deal with. I want so desperately to be loved, it is possible I am insane and seeing it where it likely is not,” she retorted, her tone becoming slightly frantic and tears glistening in her eyes.

Will was really kicking himself now, he knew he should have left well enough alone. Kind of like he should right now, but he never was one to heed the warnings of others, or even his own common sense when his temper was starting to flare. “Look Alice, I’m not trying to get you worked up, but there are lots of guys out there who are normal who will love you just as much, if not more.”

She smirked at that, her hand instinctively reaching up to grasp the pendent again. “Like you, Knave?” she questioned, in a slightly cruel tone. She knew she was being mean, and she knew she shouldn’t be but her emotions were running high and she really could not help herself.

Will winced at the words, he had asked for that. “Okay, maybe I deserve that. Well, I likely do deserve that, but I’m just saying there are guys back where I’ve been making my life, in Storybrooke, that would love and adore you just as much, if not more, than this genie. I just don’t understand why we’re risking life and limb for this guy, that’s all. I’d gladly do anything for you Alice, but right now the idea of going up against someone as ruthless as Jafar is not high on my list of fun ways to spend an afternoon. We’ve only got a slight inkling as to where he’s keeping Cyrus, and even when we get there we don’t know how to get in, and we certainly don’t know what kind of dangers he’s got set up to keep anyone from getting to his captive.”

“I don’t care,” she answered.

That riled Will up. He’d never considered himself the most rational and clearest thinker in any of the realms he knew of, but at least he could see what they were up against. All that was in this for him was a wish, and quite frankly he could do without it if it meant he could go back to Storybrooke in one piece, this whole quest be damned. Why couldn’t Alice see there was so much more out there, and other places she could go and live a relatively normal life? Why couldn’t she just see how crazy this entire quest was? And better yet, why didn’t she care how insane this was?

“Well you should. We won’t do him any good dead. If he hasn’t managed to get away on his own, or at least hasn’t succeeded at it, that tells me one thing: we’re going up against all whole lot of crazy. I don’t know magic, and I’m fairly certain you don’t either so we’re going up against some power mad sorcerer with nothing but our wits and hopefully a lot of luck on our side, since you won’t use one bloody wish to help us out!” he snapped.

“All wishes come with a cost,” she returned, getting sick of the conversation. She’d been travelling with Will for a few weeks and they’d had slight arguments, but nothing quite like this. She had a feeling it had something to do with this Anastasia she’d kept hearing about, but he wouldn’t elaborate and it was pointless to keep asking.

Will grunted at that, pushing himself up off the ground and beginning to pace. Right about then he wanted her to wish Cyrus to their side, just to see if he would appear hanging from the tree by a rope. That would be detrimental to what they were trying to accomplish, but he couldn’t help wanting it at times. He knew magic, no matter the type, came with a cost. He was from the Enchanted Forest and seen it backfire half a dozen times. Even the Looking Glass had been a type of magic, and that ended poorly for him.

“Fine, I get it. But I still want to point out you could find anyone else, we could find that bloody rabbit and go back to Storybrooke and I could introduce you to some guys that might be a little more stable than a genie. And don’t you accuse me of being heartless here, so long as you don’t use your wishes Jafar can’t use him regardless, so in the long run we’re not hurting anything. You could return to Wonderland in a few years and try this again,” he pointed out.

If Alice looked angry a moment ago, she was seething with fury now. “Would you leave this Anastasia to a life of imprisonment if you knew you could save her? And don’t tell me it is a tale of heartbreak and leave it at that. Think back, would you leave her at the mercy of someone else if you had the power to help her?”

Now she’d hit the nail on the head, so to speak. Of course, back in the day, he wouldn’t have left Anastasia to unspoken peril if he knew he could help her. He would have done anything for her, deep down he knew he’d still do anything for her. If she needed him now, he’d still drop everything for her in hopes that maybe they could go back to what they used to have. But he also knew there was no point in living in the past; that was behind him and he wanted nothing to do with her now.

He still couldn’t understand this love Alice shared with her genie, and doubted he ever would. With Anastasia they’d intended to build a normal life, which included children. Alice and Cyrus obviously had different ideas of the type of life they wanted with each other. “I guess you’re right, it wouldn’t be right to leave him to whatever horrible things Jafar has planned for him, or might be doing to him now,” he agreed. He wasn’t that heartless, and knew Jafar likely was the type to do unspeakable things to his prisoners. As much as he wanted to get out of Wonderland he couldn’t exactly condemn someone to that.

Alice smiled slightly, even if sadness still lingered in her eyes. “I just agreed with you, what more can I do to make you stop with the puppy dog look?”

“I was just thinking, that’s all,” she answered to which he groaned.

“You have to stop doing that,” he muttered.

“I can’t help it; I just don’t understand why he picked me. Why me? Why fall in love with someone so damaged, because that is what I am,” she pondered, clutching the pendent tighter in her hand. 

Will walked over to her and pulled her into a comforting hug. “You’re no more damaged than he is, or any of us for that matter. You both saw something in each other, you’ve already said you were looking for belonging and love, and although I’ve never met him, what I can gather from what you’ve said, I would fancy he was looking for the same thing. I can’t say I understand this relationship, but so long as it makes you happy that is all that matters. That is what love is Alice, seeing another person and just knowing that they complete the broken parts of you. Now let’s get some sleep, I’m pretty sure we’d find ourselves in a whole world of trouble if we went up against Jafar sleep deprived.”

Alice laughed at that, returning his hug. She wasn’t sure if his definition of love was spot on, but she’d take it. Love was different for everyone. “Thanks Will, for listening.”

“Ah, what am I here for? Other than to play knight in shining armour to you and your genie. We’ll get him back, and when we do I say we take a trip to Storybrooke, you’d both fit in there quite well.”

Alice grinned brightly, a wistful look in her eyes. He’d brought up Storybrooke a few times since their journey had begun and she began to think of it as a good place for all three of them to escape to after this journey came to an end. “I would like that, very much.”

“Right then, and first thing we do when we get back? Get me a cup of coffee and you an appointment with Dr. Hopper,” he laughed, even if she didn’t understand what was so funny about the end of his statement.

**********

Cyrus mused this must be something akin to death in the mortal world. He’d seen death before, either people passing into whatever stage came after life peacefully as well as the more violent which gave him a very, very bleak outlook on the human race, but he couldn’t help but compare this imprisonment to death.

Although maybe to him it just seemed that way, due to the fact he’d only recently begun to discover what it was to have free will again, and be able to make decisions for himself. For so many mortal lifetimes his only purpose was to do as he was told, as his life was one of servitude. Even if he disagreed with some wishes, he had to grant them.

He always warned against the wish some of his more amiable masters would bring up; wishing him free of his bottle. He longed for that, more than words could ever express. But he could not see any evil befall his masters, be them of the good and kind persuasion, or even the wicked and cruel. They were free beings and they should not pay for something he so selfishly desired. No matter how much a master would insist he’d gladly pay the price for his freedom, he could not let them do it.

He remembered one old man in particular. He truthfully could not understand why the wish had come up a second time, other than the man wanted to do something for him, as he had started to see Cyrus more like the son he had lost to a fever that had taken many in the village years ago, rather than a servant to his whims. His first two wishes had been surprising; he had used them for the good of the people in his small village. Cyrus had been absolutely shocked by that, and in his surprise he’d dropped his usual submissive behaviour. For the first time that he could remember he’d actually smiled, happy to have found his way into the possession of someone who wasn’t selfish and greedy.

After the first two, he refused to make a third. He’d done everything he wanted for the people in his village, they’d all live quite well for years to come, and in comfort knowing they’d be fed and taken care of through his wishes. There was nothing more he desired other than company and Cyrus had begun to provide that. They were fond memories for the genie, he didn’t think on them often but locked away in his silver cage he could not help them flitting through his mind.

But like all things in the mortal world, it came to an end much sooner than he’d expected. There had been hints that the man was nearing his end, and that was when he’d longed to do one last kindness and wish him free before he died of old age. Once more, Cyrus adamantly warned him against it, just because he was dying did not mean there would not be consequences. If they were not something that would happen to Cyrus himself, it could be the people he had wanted to help. To that the old man commented magic had rather idiotic rules, and went back to contemplating a third wish to free Cyrus’ will from him.

Finally, he made a third wish, and like the previous two, it surprised the genie.

**********

_”I wish for you not to return to your bottle until I breathe my last,” the man, Rayan, commanded in a voice that was growing feebler by the hour._

_Cyrus looked at him with surprise in his eyes; this master never failed to amaze him with his wishes. The first two had been selfless and it was possible this last wish could be considered selfish. It wasn’t that the man was going to die alone regardless, one of the girls from the village, Leyla, had come to sit with him but Cyrus knew Rayan wanted to have someone he had grown close to with him as well._

_The genie wasn’t too sure what Rayan saw in him; he was nothing, simply a possession to be tossed aside when his masters were finished with him. It had been that way for many mortal lifetimes and he knew it was going to be that way again very soon._

_“As you wish, master mine,” he said, much to the old man’s amusement. Even Leyla grinned. These people confused him greatly, why were they treating him like he was one of them?_

_Leyla patted the seat next to her, inviting him to sit down by the bed. Rayan likely didn’t have more than a day left, so this last reprieve from his bottle would be short lived. He just could not understand what was going on, this entire experience was confusing him._

_Rayan laughed at the perplexed look on the genie’s face, he rather enjoyed unbalancing him a bit. “You are not a possession Cyrus,” he told him, grinning._

_“Why do you insist on this? That is exactly what I am, for more lifetimes then you can even comprehend I have gone from one master to the next, and in all that time not one has treated me as you do. Some were kind and did speak with me at times as they would a friend, others were quite cruel and I knew my place with them. Why do you see me any different?” he inquired, honestly curious and very confused._

_“A possession does not have a name. A possession does not have emotions and thoughts, therefore you are not a possession and do not dare argue with me,” he answered in a tone that was both stern and a touch playful._

_Cyrus was about to, but the words would not come. He wasn’t exactly sure if it was because he had no argument to make, or that he was accustom to doing as he was told without question. He actually felt like he should argue, but could not bring himself to. He wanted to believe what he was hearing, so badly. He wanted to be seen as something more than a magical being who had only one purpose: to grant wishes. But he knew that wasn’t the way it worked, even if right now he had a master who saw him as something more it was not going to last. The man was dying and sooner or later he’d have his will tied to another master._

_It was then he noticed that Leyla was grasping his bottle in her slim fingers. He looked from her to Rayan questioningly; normally he didn’t go to another master quite that simply. He actually had no idea how it worked after the third wish was granted, if his bottle just appeared somewhere new or his old master gave him away to someone else. He’d never questioned it because it wasn’t something he needed to know._

_“When I pass on, you will go to Leyla’s family and they will keep you safe from any who may long to use you cruelly. It is the least I can do for you after so long in my company and dealing with my eccentricities,” the old man explained when he saw the confusion in the genie’s eyes. It had become a normal expression in the last year and a bit, everything Rayan did confused the genie greatly._

_He had never told him to return to his bottle, when he’d released him the first thing he’d done was ask for his name and then inquire if he would like something to eat. The look on Cyrus’ face at that had made him laugh for days._

_Rayan had all he could desire, other than his son back from the beyond but Cyrus had told him right off the four rules of magic that he had to abide by. And so he’d made his first two wishes for the benefit of others, something that confused the genie greatly. Rayan actually had felt a pang of sorrow over that, how many masters had treated him poorly or used the wishes for selfish reasons? He knew many would see a genie as nothing more than someone to command to their will and then toss aside, but he saw a curious young man locked away in a bottle. Although he was certain the word young did not really fit the magical being he’d found. He could only try to imagine how long Cyrus had lived, and everything he had seen in his long life, as well as the things he would see as time continued to move forward._

_The hours passed slowly, they all fell into friendly conversation at points, other times they sat quietly in easy company. Eventually some of Leyla’s family arrived to come sit as well. Cyrus really could not understand what was happening, other than his master was dying and passing on into a place mortals went after they left their body, a place he would never be able to follow._

_As the sun began to set, it was more than obvious Rayan was not meant to even last the night. As he began to slip away, he once more lamented he had not been able to give Cyrus his freedom. At that he’d ventured to grasp the old man’s hands, telling him he’d given him more than enough. For the first time he’d actually felt like he was like everyone else, despite the fact he was not and never would be._

_Rayan smiled happily, it meant a lot to him to hear all of that. “And now Leyla and her family will keep you with them, and teach you whatever you need to know to get by in the world. I know one day you will find a sense of freedom with someone else,” he said, pulling a hand away to rest it upon Cyrus’ shoulder in a comforting way when he saw tears forming in the genie’s eyes. “Do not cry Cyrus, this is only a new beginning for us both, and I shall see my loved ones once more.”_

_Cyrus had seen people die before, but never this close. One moment Rayan was there, the next he was gone. It shocked him; he could feel the change in the room the second it happened. He quickly stood but before he could make another move he felt himself being drawn back into his bottle._

_Rayan’s final wish was now complete._

********

After that he’d been summoned by Leyla and had spent the majority of her lifetime in the company of her family. He could never label it as service as she spaced her three wishes out in such a way that he almost forgot he was a genie at times. During the entire time with them he was never in his bottle, he was treated like a member of their family. Her brothers had taught him how to fight, her parents had taught him how to read and they had all taught him how to be more than a slave to the will of men.

He’d experienced life the way mortal’s do, he witnessed people married, people passing on and even the whole ordeal of children. That was something he thanked his lucky stars he’d never have to deal with. Children could be cute but he certainly was glad that one thing no genie could have was children.

Of course it all came to an end, as all things do. The first two wishes were of inconsequence, the third had been for protection. He’d learned firsthand about war, he never did figure out why exactly the small village was under attack by some hostile forces, but she’d wished for protection for her family and loved ones, which he’d happily granted. He had thought his bottle safe with the family but upon being summoned again discovered that was not the case.

And so the cycle began again. Once more in the possession of cruel masters who were filled with greed. Every so often he found his way in the hands of good people, but no one was ever the same as Rayan and Leyla.

That was until Alice had walked into his bottle. One look at her and he knew he’d found someone special, or rather she had found him, and he hoped she could see something more in him than just a servant to her whims. He still had a hard time not seeing himself as anything other than that, but so long as Alice could see more in him that was all that really mattered. Eventually he would grow accustom to this freedom, it had been so long that he’d almost forgotten what it felt like to have free will and the ability to think for himself.

He saw so much in her though. She was a beautiful, smart and clever girl. She never failed to amaze him, right when he thought he’d finally figured out everything there was to know about her she would off and surprise him. She’d certainly kept life interesting; there really was no way to predict what she would do at any given time or in any situation. When she’d mentioned survival in Wonderland meant being creative she had not been kidding, there were a few situations where it was her wits, and not his skills, that managed to get them both out of trouble. She was an amazing girl, and he felt fortunate that she had been the first in a long time to see him as something other than a genie just to grant her wishes.

Despite those sentiments, it still tore him up that she was risking her life to save him. He wasn’t worth it, but then again wasn’t that one reason they’d found a kindred in each other? Neither of them had love in their life. Neither of them had someone who actually cared for them, who was happy to see them and know that they were still alive. They were both alone, but in different ways.

Alice had a father, and a large extended family who should have been there to love and support her throughout her childhood. That was Cyrus’ understanding of family; they were there for you no matter what. They should have been there to support her, to love her and listen to her when she returned to England from each of her adventures in Wonderland. It pained him to think of how much she must have suffered alone, all those years with someone who didn’t believe in her. To be told she was crazy, to be treated like a small child who couldn’t discern reality from fantasy by the one person who should have believed in her no matter what. A small part of him wanted to meet this father, if only to prove to him she wasn’t crazy, but he doubted that meeting would ever happen. 

Alone with a group of people, or alone trapped in a bottle, it was all the same in the long run. No one should ever have to feel that soul devouring loneliness, the type that eats away at you until there is very little left of who you were.

Cyrus sighed, looking up towards the ceiling between the bars of his new prison. He refused to allow those feelings to destroy the person he had become thanks to the kindness of a few masters in his existence. He would get out of here, and he would find Alice again.

And together, they would find somewhere they could be together and be safe.

**Author's Note:**

> I don't think you need to read **Safe** for this one, although I do reference back to this one a tiny bit in said story.
> 
> Hoping this is enjoyable, I've been sitting here since 6:40 am editing it, so I hope I caught any mistakes.


End file.
